THE URGE = ?

So I've been struggling to sit down and write for the past few days, including in this blog.

It was getting frustrating, let me tell you. I feel bad, because I'm STILL not up to optimum writing speed on the two collaborations I'm doing, and that just sucks for the writers I'm making shit up with.

But then I was at work. It's a small cube of an area, with bad air circulation and the constant annoyance of customers wanting me to do my job. Also, it was as hot as a pair of yak nuts. Anyway, I'm sitting there ignoring my life and reading On Writing, and suddenly after page and page of Stephen King pontificating and making me crack up, I realize that I'm in the mood to write. Itching, breathing, sweating creativity. I can't wait to get home. And then I have to clean a fucking popcorn machine.

Glamourous, I know. The point is, I realized that the urge to write comes in many forms, and for me it seems to always stem from reading or watching something. This isn't the only source of the Urge, but for some reason other people make me want to do stuff. It's like they push me without know, saying, "Hey, jerk. You've got some stuff floating in that grey matter of yours that could be read like you're reading mine now. Hell, I could be reading YOUR stuff some day. I could love it or hate it, but either way I would be reading it. The point is that you know you can do it. Like me. I did it. I'm cool. You know you want to be too."

So I need to start inundating myself with books and movies to keep me going. I apologize to those two guys, those magnificent writing partners; one of which reads this. Sorry. Please don't make me run myself through with a sword.

In other news, drowning in writer's block leads to a relapse in Halo. My skills are sharp. My grenades fly true. That's some good news I guess.

Right. Well. Maybe I'll update more later.

THE URGE = SOMETIMES COMES FROM ANOTHER'S PERSON'S BULLSHIT

[Hi.

I can't think of a topic to write about right now, but I wanted to write a little bit and see if it got me going.

I'm dragging my feet on all of my writing at the moment. I can't figure out why. Sorry to those I'm writing with. Not fair.

Can't think of anything. The title is "placeholder" because this isn't a real update.

:(

Maybe I'll write about scheduling later.

EDIT 1: Maybe I'll edit this throughout the day.

EDIT 2: Drag Me To Hell looks so rad to the maximum.]

TIME THAT HAS PASSED = ?

First off, thanks to Skip Hursh for making my sweet new title picture. Head over to his page to check out his sweet art skills.

Second off, I'm pretty livid about this whole Tucker Max at OSU thing. I just watched the video of the protest linked on Fark and I'm extremely proud of those who showed up to protest. You interrupted and everyone heard. Though it was never shut down, you guys did your best. Tucker Max is a terrible human being and I have no idea how he sleeps at night. (Did I see John Pate stand up and yell at one point? I hope so, that is so rad.)

____________________________

Right. On to other, more pleasant things.

Tonight I am going to be trudging through a bit of writing I've had a hard time getting around to, plus a little extra for a Producer in LA.

This is a part of that bit of writing, my blog, because I should update more often. I figure I'd start off with it as a way to get warmed up AND procrastinate. One stone. After this, I'll be writing mostly notes on Mike's script submission and my page or two of scriptage. I'll finish up with some technical writing for that Producer. Fun night. Good thing I've got a video chat going to keep me company. (Hi, Cass!)

So, I've started reading On Writing by Stephen King again, this time with more drive to finish it. I don't know what has sparked in me since the last time I tried, but it's going really fast now. I think I've probably matured as a writer to where I want to eat up anything and everything I can on the subject that isn't boring and pretentious. (He makes mention of another book right at the beginning that every writer should read. I'll nail that next.) Say what you will about Stephen King, the man has done a lot and has tremendous amounts of wisdom.

I hope someday I can be wise.

Also, I read Neil Gaiman's blog religiously, and found that in that link there is an awesome writer's POV on how a fan should feel when waiting for the next installment of a series. (Pretty much summed up as that the writer is "not your bitch.")

So these past few days of break from blogging has made me realize that to write, you should also read. A whole damn bunch.

- As I'm writing this I'm thinking about the technical writing I have to do and wondering, "Is it okay to be funny and colloquial?" Probably. I'll try it a few ways. -

Hmm. Let's see. Not only writing business has been going on, but other business as well. I've been working on a Best Man Speech (I guess that's writing, goddamn it.), and just got fitted for a Tuxedo for the same occasion. I'm really happy for both Skip and Emily. I just gotta keep myself from quoting Back to the Future as the opening lines in front of HUNDREDS OF ONLOOKERS.

I've mowed the lawn.

Man. I guess all I do is write. I'm okay with that.

So I guess I should do some writing. That and be constantly interrupted by the WOOT OFF going on.

Get used to the linking of things.

TIME THAT HAS PASSED = NOT WASTED... SOME OF IT AT LEAST.

CURRENT PROJECTS = ?

For those of you interested, I'm going to take the opportunity of this blog post to talk about stuff I'm writing and thinking about writing. Maybe it'll give me some inspiration along the way.

SCRIPT:

I'm currently engaged in a co-writing venture with a friend in Philadelphia. It's hard to do it long distance, and I find it a struggle creatively to brainstorm through instant messages. The trading off and on of written stuff isn't so bad, except it is hard to find time with both our schedules to promptly respond to one another. I should be reading and writing notes on the bit he's sent me right now.

- The script itself is an anti-hero story, reminiscent of Robin Hood and A History of Violence.
- Set in modern day, in and around a large city.
- The main character is a likable bad-guy, and he's a blast to write.
- It is being written with sequels in mind: hopefully, if we get it sold eventually and people like it, it will bloom into the trilogy as I've imagined it. The sequels and threads are written into the structure of the first installment, even if it goes nowhere. Just in case.

PROSE:

P1: One thing I've got solidly locked down is very early in it's development stages. We've got our seed idea and broad concept. Our characters, though, have yet to even be named. This project is a secret with a very definite deadline. I can't say any more for fear that the wrong people will catch wind.

I can say, however, that it is another collaboration. Different writer, and one I've been eager to work with since the beginning of my love affair with making shit up. Let's just say that they are hella rad and extremely talented. I'm lucky.

P2: I've got a ghost story haunting my head (huzzah!). I'm not sure how many projects I can take on, but this one just wont go into the light (zing!) and will probably have to be released soon. I'm thinking it will be a novella, if not a short. I think the character and the situation is extremely interesting (a closing down retirement home and it's final living inhabitant), so we'll see how much story flows out before I've finished doing them justice.

P3: A short that I started writing back in 2007 has resurfaced in my brain. I may have to do something about that as well. A bizarre tale about a group stuck on a subway car in a very unusual place.

OTHER:

I have an idea for a TV series. Love. Zombies. Dark Comedy.

MASTERPIECE:

At least I hope it will be. It will be my most serious attempt at something profound and meaningful through script. The timing isn't right for it, and I thought earlier this year that someone came out with a too similar of an idea for me to even keep it around. I have to write it though, because of a deep love for part of the inspiration: Blade Runner.


I'm a jerk for saying "masterpiece" and implying that I think it is one. Confidence is one thing, but that is just ridiculous. I only said that word because when I think "masterpiece" I think "greatest struggle towards the end result, and the only reason it was ever finished was because of some unchecked passion for it."

That begs the question, however, "Can a 'masterpiece' be accidental?"

Maybe I'll tackle that in the next episode.


CURRENT PROJECTS = SCRATCHING "LET US OUT" IN MORSE CODE ON THE WALLS OF MY BRAIN

... even though I don't know morse code.

HOW I SOUND = ?

Discussions, discussions.

For a writer, I sure do have a lot of discussions about the practice of it. It's approaching the one-to-one ratio, and that's no good. I don't want to cut back on the talking, so I should pump up the writing. DO instead of over-thinking. But, with more writing and less talking about it, where will I get ideas to blog?

Where I get the rest of my ideas: an albino leprechaun's pocket.

... I fear I've said too much. I hope the Brotherhood Alliance of Writers doesn't come after me for that one.

So I was talking with my cousin Corey (also a writer) today, and we were talking about self doubt and confidence in regards to writing.

When I'm writing, never once do I feel like I'm writing anything groundbreaking or up to professional par. In fact, it's a struggle to keep myself from quitting because I think I'm being So Lame. The same goes for reading it when it's finished: where I then proceed to edit the ever-loving-shit out of what I just slaved over. I was thinking about this earlier today, and brought it up to Corey. I'm happy to report that he at least has some idea of what I'm talking about. Then it hit me:

It's like hearing your own voice recorded, or seeing yourself in video. Something just sounds and looks weird about it, because we're all cooped up inside our own heads. Same with ideas and creativity. I get weirded out and really critical about what decides to push open the revolving door of my brain and forcibly conquer the page in front of me. It's unsettling, to say the least.

But then Corey mentioned his love for writing, about how he just really wanted to do it, because he loved it so much. The same goes for me. But that's only a portion of the reason why we write. Among other reasons, I write because I have a love/hate relationship with this gut feeling I get when I finally decide to say, "To Hell with this!" and pass it along to someone else to read. That horribly amazing queasy feeling of not knowing whether or not they're going to like it, and the finality of it being NOT YOURS ANYMORE is like crack and horse tranquilizer to me.

The reader, the audience, takes whatever they want or need from it, regardless of what I intend. I just hope they like it, are moved or entertained by it, read it the whole way through and just maybe realize that I loved that little freakin' baby up until I printed it's ass off. For the most part. Sometimes that baby gave me hell and just wouldn't shut up.

Writing is just an awkward, beautiful, thing that I can not stop myself from doing.

I've got 3 projects going right now, 2 that are on a deadline (kind of, one for sure.) The script I'm working on at the moment NEEDS to be worked on, and I plan on doing so this evening.

Not only that but I have about three other projects that people have given me to read and look over. I feel like such a douche for not reading them immediately, but things come up and I have to be in a mood for certain genre. My apologies to them, they will get done.

HOW I SOUND = NOT HOW I THINK I DO. OR SOMETHING.

EDIT: Upon screwing around, I ended up following my own blog over there ->

I'm not that self centered. I can't figure out how to undo it or block myself from looking stupid.